Want to Talk to My Girlfriend about becoming legal

[Kurtis]

i want to talk to her about getting married and having her become a legal resident in the united states. what are the steps and forms i must fill out to have this happen? and is there any way we can do all the paperwork while she resides in the united states? i do not want to see her get deported. what are the things we need to know to have this happen. i love her to death and want to help her in anyway i can!

[Cherokee]

http://immigrate2us.net/forum/showthread.php?t=2395

This thread is a good place to start for reading about what you need to know. You can definitely start the process while she is in the country.
You should also give us more info on how she entered, with a visa or without. Through a port of entry, or through the desert, etc.
How many times she's entered, how long she stayed each time. How old she was when she entered.
Any criminal record, or deportations?

Also, welcome to the site!

[Laura]

Where is she from and how did she enter the U.S.? If she came on a visa she most likely can do the process from the states (Adjustment of status) but if she entered without inspection she'll need to go abroad at some point - and that's what the guide Cherokee linked is about.

[MiSantito]

After you determine if she is eligible, I would recommend the fiance visa over the spousal visa. It is a lot quicker. We applied in January and were approved in March to come to Mexico.

[Glühbirne]

If you want a little more time before getting married, you could go for a fiancee visa. For example, if you want to plan a wedding or something, it might be a better route.

[Kurtis]

ok ill talk to her more about this today. so if she entered in illegally (im pretty sure she did) than how hard does that make the process?

[Laura]

Guide for an undocumented significant other (http://tinyurl.com/5nwyon).

[stephluvju]

Good luck! You've come to the right place!

[Kurtis]

okay im still unsure about the bans. i have read pretty much all of it on differant places and i get mixed responses. say she EWI three years ago, she is not 18 yet but turns 18 in a month. do the 180 days start then? or is she ineligible because she was here illegally for longer than a year?

[gatita]

okay im still unsure about the bans. i have read pretty much all of it on differant places and i get mixed responses. say she EWI three years ago, she is not 18 yet but turns 18 in a month. do the 180 days start then? or is she ineligible because she was here illegally for longer than a year?

I just PMed you too. Her bans don't kick in for her then until she is 18 years, and 6 months old. I would file the fiancee visa (K-1) for her then right now; if she stays low, she could stay with you here for a couple of months until it's approved. (You may need parents' permission, though since she's underage- check your state laws.) If it's not approved by the time she's like 18 years, and 3 months, I would send her back to her native country to wait for it to finish processing and for your K-1 interview. If she's not caught by immigration, and she's not in the U.S. still illegally at 18 years, 6 months, you two shouldn't even need a waiver!

She only entered once illegally, right?

[Kurtis]

she has only entered once and i still have not gotten the info about how she entered but i think she did so through false ID as i have seen her fake resident card so it has got me worried. is there a way they can find out about it or can we act like it was just a EWI

[KE06]

I wouldn't be so sure that her having a fake resident card is how she entered. Lots of people have them to work. But this is something that you guys need to be talking about if you are even considering such serious steps. If you don't even know how she got here, are you sure you are ready to start such a serious, comitted process? Really, you can't until you know everything. If you guys are that serious, it's time for some heavy communication. :)

[Cherokee]

I wouldn't be so sure that her having a fake resident card is how she entered. Lots of people have them to work. But this is something that you guys need to be talking about if you are even considering such serious steps. If you don't even know how she got here, are you sure you are ready to start such a serious, comitted process? Really, you can't until you know everything. If you guys are that serious, it's time for some heavy communication. :)

I agree.

[Kurtis]

yeah i know what your saying its just hard cause she works so much i barely get to talk about these things. and she is very shy on the subject to.

[gatita]

You have to find out exactly how she crossed; and don't wait since she's turning 18! You could escape the whole waiver process...

[Laura]

She's just turning 18?! That's great. You could do a K-1 and she could leave the U.S. before she is 18.5 and not need a waiver at all. Your K-1 process could possibly be done around the time she has to leave and she could be back pretty quickly!

[gatita]

She's just turning 18?! That's great. You could do a K-1 and she could leave the U.S. before she is 18.5 and not need a waiver at all. Your K-1 process could possibly be done around the time she has to leave and she could be back pretty quickly!

That's exactly what I wrote to him last night. Not sure he understands how (potentially) fortunate these two are!

[Kurtis]

ok ill talk to her about it today! so if i file the K-1 she has to leave for it to process?

[Laura]

No, she has to leave for her visa interview because she entered without inspection, but she will want to leave before she turns 18.5 to avoid having a bar for illegal presence and needing a waiver. This is all assuming she didn't present a U.S. citizen passport of birth certificate at the border. That would be a big problem.

So, you could file the K-1 fiance visa, it would take some months before she gets her interview, but she would just want to leave in about 6 months regardless so she doesn't have a ban. Maybe she could have her visa interview in 8 or 9 months, so she would be in Mexico maybe a couple months before she would be able to get her visa and come back. Then you would marry within 90 days and file for adjustment of status to permanent resident.

[LilB]

Kurtis, I'm so happy for you. You are truly fortunate! Definately do the K-1 cuz then she could stay with you in the US until it's interview time and she only has to go back home for her appt and get her VISA at the appt. Assuming she goes back before reaching 18 1/2 years old, of course. No waiver necessary! You got it easy! Go get 'em! So act fast!

[gatita]

Kurtis, I'm so happy for you. You are truly fortunate! Definately do the K-1 cuz then she could stay with you in the US until it's interview time and she only has to go back home for her appt and get her VISA at the appt. Assuming she goes back before reaching 18 1/2 years old, of course. No waiver necessary! You got it easy! Go get 'em! So act fast!

Ditto to both this post and Laura's.

Here is a good site for more K-1 info. http://www.familybasedimmigration.com/k1-visa.html
Also, go to visajourney.com for more help- go to the K-1 forum. This is an awsome site; just trying to give you more sites for general K-1 advice.

[Kurtis]

omg thank you guys you are the best im trying to get a hold of her to tell her!

[gatita]

Good luck! We'd all love to be in your situation! :)

If you get this thing worked out, and she does end up going back to Mexico for a few months while you wait for you appointment (which will be in Ciudad Juarez), make sure she keeps records of her leaving, getting a job, etc. have he collect a peper trail, so that when she goes to the K-1 appointment, she can say, yes I entered illegally, but I left before I was 18.5 years old, and here's the paper proof.

[LilB]

omg thank you guys you are the best im trying to get a hold of her to tell her!

So are you going to go all out with proposing or what? Tell us about her. Tell us why she's THE ONE.

Us girls here like to hear mushy stories like this....

[Kurtis]

well i view it like this. if she has this little window of opportunity i dont have the time and money to get a ring and propose in a fashionable way. i want to get this hell over with then get a proper wedding and all that done with her family in mexico. she was very busy today as the family she is living with is leaving to mexico soon so she was trying to find a place to stay i saw her for about five minutes so i didnt have much time to talk to her in depth about this. but tomarrow she does not work and neither do i so i will be going to her house to talk more about it with her and the family she lives with as one of the sons knows perfect english and my spanish is not entirely fluent.

the reason why she is the one is very hard to explain but ill sum it up. she excepts me for who i am and doesn't care what i did or who i was before but who i am now. she told me her life and i feel the same about her. we are in the same situation with our fathers slowly dying and we are there for each other for support. it is the first girl that i have been in a relationship that doesn't care about my social status, the car i drive, and that actually cares about me and doesn't find me and indispensable sex toy (we are both virgins as we feel it is solely for marriage) and i have had GF that don't feel that way. i care about her family in Mexico and have done everything i can to help them. she is just a good person all around. when i am with her its like the happiest i can be and when i am away from her its like all i think about is her. when she is sad i feel it and it tears me up. when i learned she might have to go back to Mexico it brought me to tears. of course we have had our fights but who doesn't. she is really shy about sharing her feelings with me and i understand as her previous relationships have been all but good. i overheard her talking (in Spanish) and she said i was the only man for her. and that just made my day! i have never had anyone in my life feel for me that way, not even my parents. i just feel if i let her go i will be involved in a marriage later on that will just be filled with arguments. i don't know if you guys see that has marriage material but its just so much stuff that is hard to explain that i doubt you would ever understand.


oh and GO OBAMA! this man loves the mexicans!

[KE06]

Awwwwww! So sweet. How long have you been together?

[LilB]

My hubby actually gave me my 1st kiss when I was 14. 11 years later, we are still going strong. And I know about the virgin thing, it was the same with us. Thank you for sharing that. Now I don't feel like a loner on that aspect anymore cuz I married my 1st love...

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you???

[gatita]

BTW...we are doing a K-1 visa as well. We sort of propsed to each other...had been talking about it on and off for about 6 or more months. After I saw how much "decent" engagement rings were, I told him to forget it. Maybe we'll find one in Mexico this summer that I can also wear after we're married too. So, you are not alone in that area!

[Kurtis]

i am same age

[losguerra]

BTW, engagement rings don't have to be expensive! I'm not a normal girl, but I looove gemstones that aren't diamond, especially sapphire. My husband got me a great sapphire ring for our engagement. I know he didn't spend much on it at all, and I love it so much/it's so special to me that I kept it as my wedding ring. Maybe you can get a nice, affordable (I mean REALLY affordable) ring for now, and then get her something nicer for her wedding ring someday.

There's something so wonderful about just having that symbol. :) Right now immigration has me separated from my husband (don't worry, our situation is ridiculous, this won't happen to you). I love seeing my ring when I miss him. It reminds me of how much he cares about me, and helps me remember that our commitment is so much deeper than anything the US government can inflict on us.

I'm a mushy romantic, but to me, it's all about the meaning, and not really about the expense...

[Kurtis]

i cant wait to show her the papers tomorrow :)

[Kurtis]

okay so i just fill out i-129f and g 325a and send them in wtih documentation of my citz, photos of us together, and a cover letter? is this everything or what else is there?

[Kurtis]

wow is the fee really $455? i thought that was for a waiver? looks like i need to save some money back.

[Laura]

There are a lot of fees. $455 is also for the waiver, I think. And eventually $1010 when she is back in the U.S. and you want to adjust her status.

[Kurtis]

okay so how much do i send with the i129f and g325a?

[Salsa2]

Read the I-129f instructions VERY VERY carefully and do exactly what it says. Info regarding the required fee will be in the instructions.

It is ALWAYS a good idea to read instructions (in general, not just for immigration), yet people never do!

[gatita]

okay so i just fill out i-129f and g 325a and send them in wtih documentation of my citz, photos of us together, and a cover letter? is this everything or what else is there?

You will need more than just pictures togehter. Look for other paper proof of having met and relationships. It will be harder becsue you two are so young, but you need to do it.

go to visajourney.com

and familybasedimmigration.com for some help. And yes, it is $455 i think. Look at the forms section of USCIS website for the exact amount.

[Kurtis]

what would be other proof? phone calls? movie ticket stubs? receipts from dinner. letters to each other?

[1MessedUpSourPatchKid]

My hubby actually gave me my 1st kiss when I was 14. 11 years later, we are still going strong. And I know about the virgin thing, it was the same with us. Thank you for sharing that. Now I don't feel like a loner on that aspect anymore cuz I married my 1st love...

If you don't mind me asking, how old are you???


I join the club. I too waited until I was married. :blush:

[Auntlily]

Hehe...us too!!! Wooohooo for the virgin folk!!

[1MessedUpSourPatchKid]

BTW, engagement rings don't have to be expensive! I'm not a normal girl, but I looove gemstones that aren't diamond, especially sapphire. My husband got me a great sapphire ring for our engagement. I know he didn't spend much on it at all, and I love it so much/it's so special to me that I kept it as my wedding ring. Maybe you can get a nice, affordable (I mean REALLY affordable) ring for now, and then get her something nicer for her wedding ring someday.

There's something so wonderful about just having that symbol. :) Right now immigration has me separated from my husband (don't worry, our situation is ridiculous, this won't happen to you). I love seeing my ring when I miss him. It reminds me of how much he cares about me, and helps me remember that our commitment is so much deeper than anything the US government can inflict on us.

I'm a mushy romantic, but to me, it's all about the meaning, and not really about the expense...



:ditto: I would definitely get a ring even if it wasn't too expensive. My husband got me a ring he could afford when we first got engaged then a couple of years later we got what I like and I keep my original engagement ring in a safe place. I won't get rid of that ring for anything. I wanted white gold and that's the only reason why we switched it but the memories attached to that ring I want to treasure for the rest of my life :wub:

[gatita]

what would be other proof? phone calls? movie ticket stubs? receipts from dinner. letters to each other?

Yes. They want to be sure that you have physically met. And strangely enough, photos alone usually don't cut it. Do you both have credit cards or debit cards? If you do, go to a movie together. Each person pay for their ticket with his/her own credit card. Go out to eat together. Each person pay with his/her own credit card. Send in pics, but also send in one where your fiancee poses with your family, etc. Any bills showing you called each others' cell phones? Email printouts, messenger chats, we had salsa lessons togehter- confirmaion with both names for that. We also had joint bills...

Don't worry if you don't have ll of these things. I'm sure the gov't. will figure out becsaue you two are young, but you might need to conciously do something to generate paperwork proof in the next couple of weeks.

Some people advise just sending pics, but some fiance visas get an RFE for not enough evidence. Don't get too stressed, though, just put in as much as seems reasonable.

read this http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.php?autocom=custom&page=k1guide

and this http://www.familybasedimmigration.com/forum/k1visa.php

:)

[Kurtis]

well i just found out my GF is actually from guatamala how does this affect the process?

[losguerra]

well i just found out my GF is actually from guatamala how does this affect the process?

It shouldn't affect very much, as long as she doesn't get past that 180 days past 18 mark in the US. If she does, she will need a waiver for unlawful presence. In Mexico, this process can be completed within a month of the visa interview (sometimes days), but in Guatemala, it would require her to stay in Guate (or outside the US) for more than 6 months waiting for a decision on her waiver.

You guys would want to avoid having to involve a waiver at all. So make sure she doesn't overstay long enough for any bans to affect her.

[Kurtis]

the host family she is living with right now is also planing to move to mexico so would her moving into an apartment with me help as evidence of a relationship?

[gatita]

the host family she is living with right now is also planing to move to mexico so would her moving into an apartment with me help as evidence of a relationship?

Yes, if you put at least some of the bills in both of your names, you can use the bills as proof of relationship. Since she is from Guatemala, you really wnat to be sure that she leaves before she is 18.5 years of age, because as of now, Guatemala does not have the pilot program, like Mexico doea. In Mexico, it is possible, for your waiver to be approved on the spot, for Guatemala, it is like 6 months plus waiting in Guat for her. So, make sure she gets out in time.

[Kurtis]

she has mexican papers though

also is there any other way besides marriage?

[Cherokee]

she has mexican papers though

also is there any other way besides marriage?

Do you mean she was born in Guatemala but has a passport from Mexico? Or she is a dual citizen?

It sounds to me like you might want to think about this a little while longer before making a decision. Maybe get to know each other better. :)

[gatita]

she has mexican papers though

also is there any other way besides marriage?

If you mean she is a dual Mexican-Guatemalan national, she may be able to go through Mexico, not sure. If she's jsut using some fake papers saying she's a U.S>permanent resident from Mexico, than no.

No, there really is no other way. If you aren't sure about the marriage, maybe take a few months to figure it out, but it sounds like you'd really need to see more of each other before you two make a decision.

[Laura]

I think it's pretty unusual to be a dual-Mexican/Guatemalan citizen.

I agree with the others. This is an intense, often long, complicated process. It goes well for many members of this site but that doesn't mean it should be taken lightly. It's expensive and time-consuming and you really need to be committed to one another beforehand. I'm not saying you are not, but it sounds like you are young and don't know each other extremely well, which is going to be a problem when you have to prove (document) your real relationship, etc.

Take some time, communicate well, talk openly and see where things go. She absolutely cannot hide anything from you about her immigration history, that needs to be out on the table well before you start the process.

[Pinkpig]

She absolutely cannot hide anything from you about her immigration history, that needs to be out on the table well before you start the process.


this is double :ditto:

Both of you must completely understand her immigration history BEFORE you start the process.

I think that EVERYONE starting the immigration process NEEDS to have a consultation with an experienced immigration lawyer (Laurel Scott or Heather Poole are the only two lawyers that I personally recommend) BEFORE you start anything OFFICIALLY.

It is a long, complicated, expensive, and emotionally exhausting process. Be sure of what you are doing before you decide to go forward.

[Kurtis]

yes i totally understand you guys. there is a lot of reasons she hides things and its because of a lot of pain in her past. im not at will to discuss her horrible life but i am working on gaining her trust in me. she has a lot of issues with people lying to her, promising her great things, then leaving her out of nowhere. she has love for me but is to afraid to get to involved right now for fear i will just ditch her. i have tried telling her that i am not that way but her past is just full of disappointment pain and suffering that it is hard to believe anyone. i guess if we cant get to know more about each other before 18.5 hits ill start the waiver process :(

[discoviking]

Well, I would get her out of the country before she turns 18.5 regardless. That way you will avoid the waiver process alltogether.

That being said, I don't want to rain on your parade, but if you did not know what country she was born in and how she entered the US, you have some serious communication and trust issues that needs to be resolved before you even think of getting married. If she does not trust you enough to be completely open with you about these things, you have a serious problem.

There is also the issue of support. Do you meet the minimum income requirements for an affidavit of support? Between the two of you, are you going to be able to get your own place to live? Do you want to have kids right away, or are you going to go to college first? Can you support a family if she gets pregnant now?

I'm just playing Devil's advocate here. Love is a wonderful thing, and if she is the one, go for it. But be 100% sure first.

[Laura]

yes i totally understand you guys. there is a lot of reasons she hides things and its because of a lot of pain in her past. im not at will to discuss her horrible life but i am working on gaining her trust in me. she has a lot of issues with people lying to her, promising her great things, then leaving her out of nowhere. she has love for me but is to afraid to get to involved right now for fear i will just ditch her. i have tried telling her that i am not that way but her past is just full of disappointment pain and suffering that it is hard to believe anyone. i guess if we cant get to know more about each other before 18.5 hits ill start the waiver process :(

This is all understandable. You are looking at this having the whole perspective on things and really we are just suggesting what, immigration-wise, would be best. The waiver process, as long as she is eligible for the waiver, is not all that bad through Mexico. If she's from Guatemala, it will take more time but it's still do-able. I agree with disco's last words there though. Think it through - if you are sure - go for it, but at this point it doesn't really seem like she is able to provide the level of vulnerability that will be necessary for the process. If you wait, you will have to go through the waiver process, which has its pitfalls for sure. But many of us have done it as well.

[Adriane]

Kurtis, if you just found out that your girlfriend is from Guatemala and not Mexico, I am concerned than maybe you don't know enough to start this process. I'm not doubting either of your feelings, but this is a very complicated process and as Laura & Pinkpig said before, you need to know EVERYTHING before you start.

It is absolutely crucial that both of you understand the process before you start.

We had a member, Papaya, who's wife EWI'd from Mexico. Everything was fine for her to be eligible to file her I-601 waiver and there was no reason to expect anything but the best.

At her interview (Mr. Papaya wasn't allowed in with her) the officer interviewing her asked how she got into the US in the first place. In reality, she was very small and someone had hidden her in a suitcase and that's how she got in. At the interview, she was too embarrassed to admit that and so she said, "Well, I just said I was a US citizen at the bridge and they let me in." And that, claiming US citizenship, carries a lifetime ban for which there is no waiver available ever. It was a HUGE tragedy that could have been avoided....

Perhaps she could come & visit us on her own? Many of us speak Spanish and we could explain things to her... Maybe the anonymity of the internet would make talking to us easier?

Good luck. I know (believe me, I know!) that this is hard. But there is a happy ending waiting ahead...