My SAD SAD STORY!!! Occurring now in my life!!!

[mamacita]

Another SAD Story - mine today!!!!!

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Hi all of my Amiga's and Amigo's!

Well, this story has touched me so much that I suppose I have to come out and let you all know I too am one who is caught up in the EMOTIONAL abuse issue as I type this story!

I so hoped after my husband arrived back home in the USA after a 14 month separation that our marriage would thrive and be happy and our ordeal would have brought us closer,,,,,,,,,,,,was I so wrong! The Pizza Man as he announced when he knocked on the Los Cedros hotel room door wasn't the real Pizza man I thought he was, you shall too see!

Here is my saga and it continues even up to today!!!!

We got back to the USA on 12/5/07, and from that day forward to this morning I have been in a living HELL! My husband's mood is so unpredictable from day to day, from eyelash batting to seconds, it's as if he has two personalities?

We went to the Public storage 2 days after he arrived back home, and it started then, the Jeep/SUV had a flat tire and wouldn't start, MY FAULT, of course, no biggie that I had paid $700.00 in storage fees over 14 months to make sure his SUV was secure and locked up, it was my fault I didn't have the flat fixed and that I didn't go start up his SUV on a weekly basis, now this has cost him a new tire and new battery, but its my fault; all along yelling at me! How could I do this to him?

Now over the last few months the yelling has escalated to screaming and cussing me out, calling me WHITE TRASH, money hungry MF, dumba, Stupida,
and dumb ***** and Fuc....kr all the time almost on a daily basis. He used to come up and hug me good afternoon, now it's in the door and fussing about something every day now. Our Sex life is non existent completely!!! MMM?
I have told him numerous times he needs to seek counseling to learn to control his explosive temper and his no sexual desires, he claims it's his back that bother him which I do know he hurt in Mexico while working and is currently going to therapy, but this has now come to the point of no return, NADA sex,,,,,period! OK,,,it doesn't take a rocket scientist to figure this out!

Well, on Valentines Day, he gave me a stuffed bear with a card not signed, just stuffed in the envelope, my name wasn't anywhere nor did he even write an comment,,,just blank here you go Mama! OK! Mmm, weird. Well the weekend after Valentines day I took his "NEW ENVOY SUV" early one morning to get donuts and wanted to take the CD out of the player and turn on the radio, so I did and in his console of his SUV I found a new CD with a nice neat piece of paper so nicely cut with serrated edges with a note in Spanish/silver ink to her Papi Chulo how much she loved him and wanted to live the rest of her life with him,,,,,,,,,,,,OH BOY, I was so shocked and numb at that point I couldn't even feel my body, how could this be happening,,,,well dummie woman, he keeps his cell phone on him like underwear and has it at all times, and is texting constantly after work ignoring me until bed time. When I approached him about this note, he said he wrote it to himself, from the words in one of the Spanish songs, and it was dated in dark ink at the top 2/14/08 in his small hand writing, he denied this and said he and a friend at work wrote it out and put it in there, right what two MACHO guys are going to take the time to write something in nice silver ink, cut the edges all cute and put it in the front cover of a CD, not going to happen and he still denies this is from another woman, but now I don't trust him at all, and with no trust, nothing, right, right!!!!

He keeps his cell phone on him at all times even takes into the bathroom and the only time is when he is sleeping is it not on his body physically in his pocket. OK, ok, so he is cheating right,,,,,,sure he is! He tells me it's his cell phone and he paid for it and he can do whatever he wants with it, text on it, throw it out the window, but I am not to touch it, he could care less about my cell phone or who calls me.

When I don't cook then I am lazy, I have see him lose his temper so badly that after I have cooked for 1 hr, he will get up from the table and refuse to eat or go out the door and go to Whataburger and come back and eat right in front of me after I have cooked, just getting back at me with his little REVENGE thing ;he will tell you he has to do to get back at people who piss him off!!! He never has to worry about his clothes being dirty, nor does he have to clean house, I do it all. He let me use his credit card he had gotten after being home for 4 months, I used it and charged $100 on it and told him I'd pay him back last Monday the 31st, he refused and said, no problem I'll pay it, well this morning he checked the balance on his credit card and went balistic, he had a banana in his hand and threw it across the room, and once again here we go, I am a money hungry White MF, and using him. OK well I don't see how using him is the appropriate wording, I pay our rent/alone, pay ins on both cars which is $188.00 a month, his is 1/2 and he doesn't help pay that, I pay the cable,phone,dsl, renter's insurance, storage which we still have things in there @ $50 a month and many other little things. He pays for the groceries at around $80-$120 a week, sometimes puts gas in my car, and washes both cars, and every now and then pays the cable/dsl/home phone which runs around $169.00, and then throws a fit because I used his CC for $100 which I told him I would pay for, and so this morning I was the wicked witch and he cussed me out, hit the wall, threw the banana and said, "well, it's because of you my temper is so bad, I have been this way since I got home because of you, quote:::: "I didn't have anyone while I was in Mexico to send me money to help me out", I suffered, it's alway's I. Well, OK I had a can of hairspray in my hand and dropped it and started crying,,,,no one, well he had me, who managed to pay all of our bills alone while he was gone, moved by myself 1 time, payed to have a tow truck take his Jeep to storage so it would be safe and spent around $1200 in storage fees, and kept his Jeep and painting equipment all safe and sound. He also informed me not to touch his new laptop that was his not mine, and what is his is his and mine is mine. Last Saturday he gave me $100 to buy groceries and said he had to work so I went to the store and then happen to call him around 3:00pm to tell him I found out he had gotten the job bid on the condo he is currently painting while I was @ the store, he was eating and I heard kids voices, I asked are you all still at work, He said, "yes we are" ok, well due to my hand problems and some of you know I had extensive hand surgery last March and another hand surgery approaching on May 12th it's hard for me to carry heavy stuff, I said, Mmm, kids running around in the empty house, a 10,000 sq ft huge CASA, and he said no, you misunderstood me, I said, ok where are you @ honey, he said with friends, I said @ >>>>>>>>> a certain guys name and then he started cussing me out and said GD to me you follow me like smothering me, I need to take a camera or better yet use my camera phone, so I hung up on him. He said they had gotten off work and were walking around a mall and were eating chinese food when I called, I don't believe that either, think he was with his little woman who wrote the note to him?

OK, I know what is going on I am letting this guy run me, manupliate me and lie to me and I keep on letting him do this. I know this man doesn't love me any more nor does he care how he talks or disrespects me. Yet I allow it. the verbal and emotional abus has gotten so bad that I don't sleep more than 4-5 hrs at night because if we argue before going to sleep I am so upset it affects me and then I am exhausted at work the next day on little sleep!

He has lost his mind, he commented well, I can do better without your dumb *****, spending money all the time, well if I didn't have to pay most of the bills then I wouldn't ask him for money. I now feel like I am at the bottom of a bucket/ or pit and I cannot climb out, my self esteem is so low,,,what or where do I start this process to bring myself up out of this messy situation?

He thinks he is such a Papi Chulo and even when we are in the grocery store together he looks directly at other women and under his breath mumbles, Mmmmmm, Mamacita, Linda, yummy,yummy right in front of me,,,,like I am deaf or a piece of chopped liver......this hurts so much and he doesn't care cause he is so arrogant. How could this immigration process have turned our marriage into this mess, the separation or what, I just don't know what to think anymore? It's now as if we are strangers and if I bring up the immigration journey I am throwing it in his face, he says, "millions of other people have been through all of the same thing so you think you've done a marvelous thing to help me out,,,,ok right!" He has his D.L. his SS# and his 10 yr GC now so he doesn't need me any longer I suppose?

So you see there isn't happiness in all of our lives, my dream bubble of the Pizza man who when I opened the hotel door at Los Cedros on that glorious day on Dec 02, wasn't my Pizza man it was a totally different person that has turned into a barbaric MONSTER and I am so sad!

Mamacita
(Genie)
__________________
Met April 04
Married Dec 31, 04
Filed I130 March 05
USCIS sent receipt I130 Oct 05
Hubbie left for Monterrey MX, Sept 24th 06

[nineten]

I'm literally about to choke. I hate having to read your story. I've got to digest this before making a reply.

[mouse7r]

Aww honey... Im so sorry!!!!! He really has no respect for you to treat you this way... I know you dream t of the time you could be together and happy again... 14months is alongg time (thats why I worry so much) people can change..... now you need to stand up for yourself, be strong for yourself--- I dont know of any marriages where keeping your money separated like that has worked.. your suppose to be a team, your suppose to share everything. I hate to say it but you need to move on -for you, you deserve happiness and he obviously isnt giving you any.

[Sabrina022203]

Genie, I love you girl and you know I am here for you. Like I told you and I will tell you again you are to goof for this man. He is abusing you and you do not deserve this. I am here call me when you need me!

[Dorothea]

Genie, I am so sorry you've been going through all this... in complete silence about it this whole time...
Oh, I am so heart broken for you...
Please make him leave. Please.

[want2b2gether]

I really hope that things get better soon, talk to him, see if he wants to work things out, for godsakes, you got the man here that has to count for something.
just think things trought, see if you guys can work it out.
Good luck, and we are here for you.

[Laura]

Wow... I'm so sorry.. you definitely need to get out of this relationship. No words though really, after all you went through, what a travesty. :hug:

[1MessedUpSourPatchKid]

WOW! how can he be so ungrateful and not appreciate all you have done for him?

At first the fights yeah not fun but after a long separation I could almost understand it but when I got to read about his comments about other women's breast. SCREW HIM!

Girl you don't have to put up with that. What kind of husband does that? It's really sad and definitely your decision but I think you are better off without him no matter how much it might hurt you to leave. This man doesn't respect you anymore and he will get his reward at the end for biting the hand that helped him through his immigration process and even more.

Hang in there and please respect yourself and move on without him.

I'm sending you a big hug my friend.

[Glühbirne]

You are right when you say you are being abused. I'm so sorry you are going through this. You do not deserve it. **Hugs**

[christytorres]

OMG..Genie..so sorry..when I first started to read It..I said OMG..wow..I remember the day you called me..I was out getting my husband's windshield fixed..girl I can't image living with someone like that..I told my husband..the day you decide to change your ways..its going to be your address not mine..I could never put up with that..I know its not always good in the beginning..it was rough..I can say that..but I put my foot down..and My husband knows I don't put up with S#@&^% I mean it.. I lost alot because of this..and I knew what I was getting into..and I did it for us..not for me..and well he can never said I want his money..because he has none..its all about love..right..Genie I am here for you girl..HUGS HUGS..you need one and I admire you for speaking out and telling your story..it takes alot to tell people about your unhappiness..If I had some money I would go out to see you girl..but I am broke..sorry..but I will one day..call me any time..and don't let him bully you around either..you are so much better than him..and what does he mean he was alone..I wish my husband would say that..I struggled...I'll keep you in my prayers..girl..and If you want to come here..you are welcome..Tu Amiga..

[sandra191406]

I'm so sorry to see that this is going on. Please be strong and do what's right for you and your well-being.

[Pooh79]

I agree that it is abusive. I hope you find the strength to leave. So sorry this is happening. :(

[nineten]

mamacita, no matter how many times I say I'm sorry to hear this isn't going to change anything. This has irked me so much to hear of your experiencing this nightmare. There's a world of people out there and if the truth was known, there's many more that have and are undergoing the same dilemna. Thanks for having the strength to open yourself up and disclosing this very personal information. By getting help from your friends here you're taking the first step toward helping yourself. You don't have to live in this nightmare.

[Quote]
OK, I know what is going on I am letting this guy run me, manupliate me and lie to me and I keep on letting him do this. I know this man doesn't love me any more nor does he care how he talks or disrespects me. Yet I allow it.
[Quote]

Please think about these questions below for a while. We're focusing on mamacita's thoughts and feelings which are more important right now, not the husband, okay?



Does this make me happy?

Do I deserve this?

[gdalicia]

Genie I am so sorry to hear that you are going through this. I have been in exactly this type of relationship before and I know how painful it is, and how despite the pain it can be very difficult to get out. It sounds like you have a lot of clairity about your situation. I sincerely hope that you can find the strength to leave this man because if you do in 6 months or so you will look back and say:

How did I ever put up with that?!?

There are good men out there Genie that will not treat you this way. But you'll never get the chance to have one in your life if you waste anymore time with someone who does not respect or deserve you.

[gaby]

Gennie I truly believe that no woman deserved treated bad moreover no human being deserve to be treat badly, no matter how much you love some one.
At one point it will hurt to take a a big decision but remember all this feeling for our lover do not come from our heart they come from our mind , so take your time and realized if this is what you really want.
Personal opicion .
Abrazos Gennie

[AGJB]

Mamacita you are so beautiful. I don't understand why he has changed, but I do know that he is NOT the man you fell in love with.

My question is what is your plan? You've got to do something about this before he physically hurts you.

The emotional attacks will only escalate.

I urge you to please do something different to end this.

Please do something about it today - Call this # right away:

Domestic Violence Abuse Hotline near Dallas - Local Results
Ricketts, Lawanta Pastor/Founder - Women of Rhema Destiny Ministries - (817) 657-8702 - 5420 Boca Agua Dr, Fort Worth, TX - 23.00mi

[AGJB]

Please don't be embarrassed to talk to someone about this. It's taking you this long to share it with us and we talk about tons of personal stuff here on this site. Please do something about it today.

If you need someone to talk to please call me. I will PM you my cell #.

[LilB]

I'm so sorry we didn't really get to finish talking over the phone. Prospects kept coming in at work. I will try my best to call you when I get home.

But, listen girl, you don't deserve this. You're smart. You've established your own career. You can make it on your own. It will be VERY VERY hard to let go. But, you gotta do it for your own sanity. You'll feel much better about it after it's done. Maybe not immediately, but after a little while, you'll be like, "wow. I'm so glad I did this." And again, I know it's very hard to let go of someone in your life that you loved SO SO much. But, he can't be breaking you apart, Genie. Do it for you, though. Not for us. Or because we're telling you to. Do it for you, okay?

Better yet, let's settle this the easy way. Tell me where you live so I can drive over there and beat his *****!!!! Simple. Problem solved. Okay, okay, that's not rational. Although I'd luv to!!! We do live in the same town.

But, girl, keep your chin up. I'll call u in a bit.

Hugs~

[nsoto]

I"m so sorry to hear this Genie. I hope everything gets better. Please don't let him treat you this way.

GOOD LUCK!

[Luckysprite]

Genie - my goodness girl - I am so saddened by this. And outraged.

You were so inspirational to everyone while you waited for your husbands waiver to be approved. You waited - and waited - and waited - and we all see this is not the happily ever after that you deserve, or thought you would have.

You need to find that strength in yourself now - the strength you had in yourself while he was gone - and figure out what is best for you now. Tough decision, no doubt - but you can make the right things happen.

If he is really not the right thing - and I certainly don't think that he is from what you described - then figure out the best thing for you - and move forward. Working on a broken marriage is difficult I'm sure, but remember that you can not change him if he is not willing to change himself.

I am not saying throw in the towel and give up - just please just don't settle. You are beautiful, intelligent, strong and worth a helluva lot more than he is making you out to be. Don't lose yourself.

[brezarenee]

Genie, this is such a horrible story. My heart goes out to you. I can't even imagine. You are worth much more than your a**hole husband is treating you like. I hope you can find the strength to rise above and leave him behind. It will be a difficult path, but you are worth so much more than this. I'm so sorry.

[SES]

Genie,
Listem to lynette. You two need to meet and resolve this. Lynette had good heart and you need to have shoulder to cry.
I am very sorry...
Here you have good friends and we can help you.
I don't think you should stay with your husband and you need to make the call to Domestic Abuse Hotline. Maybe they can help you.
BIG HUG !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[MMGCA]

WOW! how can he be so ungrateful and not appreciate all you have done for him?

At first the fights yeah not fun but after a long separation I could almost understand it but when I got to read about his comments about other women's breast. SCREW HIM!

Girl you don't have to put up with that. What kind of husband does that? It's really sad and definitely your decision but I think you are better off without him no matter how much it might hurt you to leave. This man doesn't respect you anymore and he will get his reward at the end for biting the hand that helped him through his immigration process and even more.

Hang in there and please respect yourself and move on without him.

I'm sending you a big hug my friend.



I have no words to say after reading your storry!...but Keithsclaudie is sooo right!....love your self you don't diserve this!.....take care!!

[perez782]

Mamacita, I am so sorry to hear this. Stay strong, do whats best for you. You don't deserve this. I will pray for you!

[Emily]

What a freaking jerk. OMG you deserve so much better sweety. He's such an A******!!!!!

I hope things get better soon. I'm so sorry your going through this. I can't believe how he's talking to you.

[aprilstorm]

Genie,
I am so sorry to hear this. It is breaking my heart!!!
This is abuse my dear and you do not deserve it. Please leave...things sound as if they will only get worse. PLEASE take care of YOURSELF!!!!!! I know that it will be hard but in the long run you will be happy!!!!

[JessyRafa]

I am very, very sorry to hear this Mamacita. You deserve much, much better after everything you've been through and everything you've done for him. You have a hard road ahead, but at the end you will be the happy one and he will be the one suffering. I know it's hard to get yourself out of these situations, but I hope you can put yourself first and make a better life...

[milliesmom]

Genie, I'm so sorry you are going through this. It did take me a while to get through your post. It was difficult to read and I'm sure that it was difficult to disclose to us. Thank you for being so open and honest with us.
You don't need this guy in your life. He's ungrateful and mean. He wants YOU to leave him so that you don't go to Divorce court saying he USED you to get his GC. You need to get out of this relationship sooner than later. Hmmm.. Lynette, I can join you in beating his stupid *****! Sorry, Genie, I know this is someone you loved for a long time, not to mention the 14 months of patience, money --- all down the drain!

We are here for you...

[MMGCA]

I agree with everyone, i think you can even do something about that GC...... He dosent deserve you Or that GC...screwww Him. Im with you girls on that Bitting him up. if you decide to leave him, make him pay for what he's done to you!..... GGGRRRRRR

[Marie]

Genie, I am so sorry!! I agree with what everyone said and you need to get out of that relationship. He has no right to treat you like that at all.

*HUG*

[sweetlove1236]

Genie
my heart is broken for you. please think about yourself and your sanity. Like everyone else has been saying, things are only going to escalate. anyone that truly loves you would never do or say things that you $$$$$$$ husband said and did to you please please talk to someone. If you need to talk pm me and i will give you my tele #

[Adriane]

Genie, it's not going to get better. I am so, so very sorry, but he used you. Please don't stay any longer- throw him out and consider your options. You deserve a real marriage- and this isn't one.

I would contact USCIS immediately and tell them that you suspect that he married you for immigration benefits alone. I'm not sure there's much they can do at this point, but I think it's important that you do it. Also, if he commits battery against his spouse, that can be a deportable offense. He played you- please don't let him win.

You are a wondeful and devoted person- your sacrifice for all those months proves that. You need to get away from this monster.

Good luck.

[Cfloresgirl]

Genie..you DID do a marvelous thing for him by sticking by his side and sacrificing living your life without constant worry that immigration brings by helping him get the green card.
I was married to a cheating a**hole back in the day and believe me you deserve way better.I know none of us are emotionally involved so it's easy for us to tell you to leave,but haven't you given him enough already?
WE ARE HERE FOR YOU!

[starlynnb]

Mamacita, Please be strong and have the strength to make the right decision. You are already strong by telling us that he is verbaly abusing you! Now you need to take the next step and decide what you should do. We all can tell you what to do but you need to decide from your heart. I feel that you know what you should do and in time you will make that decision. Just remember Lynette is in the same town and she will give you her heart to help you. You will always have us on the site take care and I am so sorry he is doing this to you. Please find the strength and courage to be able to leave.

[imisshimmuch]

This is horrible, you are such a sweet and nice person, and you deserve better !
I do think that something can be done about his GC, about revoking it, but don't do this with a vengful heart, but because he's a fraud, he may have used you, it sounds like he could possibly be unfaithful and he's certainly being abusive.
I really hope you speak with a professional to see what can be done.

[Jessica]

You are being abused, please get yourself some counseling.

[discoviking]

When I approached him about this note, he said he wrote it to himself, from the words in one of the Spanish songs, and it was dated in dark ink at the top 2/14/08 in his small hand writing, he denied this and said he and a friend at work wrote it out and put it in there, right what two MACHO guys are going to take the time to write something in nice silver ink, cut the edges all cute and put it in the front cover of a CD, not going to happen and he still denies this is from another woman, but now I don't trust him at all, and with no trust, nothing, right, right!!!!

He wrote it to himself? That's the lamest excuse I have ever heard. Guys do not write cards to themslves, nor do they cut cute edges. Well, maybe Richard Simmons does, but he's gotta be --- never mind.

Anyway, what he is doing to you is not right. Being a guy and reading your description of his behaviour towards you, there is also no doubt in my mind that there is another woman involved. But you seem to have figured that out already.

It is a difficult and painful situation to be in. I know, I have been there. But believe me, the best thing you can do is to get him out of your life. But don't give him the upper hand and leave. Put your foot down and make him leave, instead. Then move on. There are plenty of nice guys out there. You can do better. Hang in there.

I wish there was something I could say to make you feel better, but I'll leave that to the ladies. They are much better at this emotional stuff than we guys are. That don't mean we don't care, we do. But we don't verbalize emotions well. On the other hand, if you need a guys point of view of what is going on, I'll answer to the best of my ability, and I'm sure the other guys one here will, too.

[AGJB]

Genie - how are you feeling? What are you doing/thinking?

I'm concerned....

[slvjvm922000]

mamacita i am so sorry that u are going thru this i cant believe how fast they can change like that. it is a very sad thing. we are all here for u

[ashleypinzon]

Personally I would not get uscis involved . I mean Karma is a B**** and he will pay for it in the end. If he wasnt this way before then maybe a seperation will clear his anger.

[Rox&Ari05]

OMG Mamacita....I dont even know what to say. As I was reading your thread, my heart began to hurt for you. I have never been in that situation, but I have heard of others who have gone through the same thing. Admit it honey, as much as it is hard to, but he used you for that green card. And if it were me in that situation I would do my research and find what I need to do to get it revoked. He is a criminal and there are many husbands or wives out there that need it more than him!

I know you are a smart and intellegent women, but you really need to make the decsion for you. If you dont leave him, it only get worse and then he may start laying his hands on you and that is not cool, bc then you migh have all the I2US family on your front door to beat is *****. No women should ever be treated like an animal. Mamacita I whish you all the luck. And may God Bless you and keep you safe.

I am sending you lots of ((((((HUGS)))))) and a Gardian Angel too:angel:

[djones9714]

I am so sorry to hear this. Going through immigration is enough on its own without having to deal with this after the ordeal is over.

I cannot begin to imagine the emotions you are feeling right now. I know there are lots of them; however, do not let him get you down. I do know that there is a big age difference between the 2 of you and he may be playing on that fact also just to keep you. Do NOT let him play with your emotions when it comes to the "age". I can imagine he has already played on that from what you have written and that is why I am mentioning this because he will definitely use that tactic.

Be strong and know that you are loved very dearly whether you know us personally or not. We are all here to love and support each other -- men and women -- and we stand by our friends.

Any time you need a friend, you just come and rant, rave or do whatever you want to do or say. That is how you will beat him at his little game -- he might think you are desperate but you're not. Over time the hurt will go away and when that happens, he better watch himself because paybacks can be he**.

Please don't give up on yourself and think about your family at this point -- I know you have lots of support and you don't need his a**.

[Pinkbutter]

Genie try to be strong ok, I also agree with everyone here, you can't stay in that relationship, omg , no one can treat you like that, he doesn't deserve you, after all you've done!! Gosh...just think about you, about what's best for you ok, don't let him hurt you anymore ok girl, you deserve better..

Big and hugss for you Genie...;)

[AMBallesteros]

:ditto:What a DOG. I hate to sound so cliche but it's the God's honest truth. He will get his in the end and it aint gonna be pretty. He thinks he's big sh**t now that he has his creds, but like it says in the Bible and I quote 1 Corintians 10:12 "COLOR="Red"]Let him that thinks he is standing beware that he does not fall." And fall he will and when he does, do not help him to get on his feet again. It's going to be hard but you've endured this far and that says that you are a strong woman. Wipe him off your feet and live you life, you deserve it.

[Dorothea]

I have just been thinking and thinking about this...
How can someone just change so completely in a year? Did you visit him while he was in Mexico?
Even his picture in your avatar, he looks like such a sweetheart... And Genie, you are always so amazingly positive. But now when you describe him, he is a monster. What happened to him?
I know I'm not helping at all, you must be so completely confused already. I will be thinking of you.

[SAD ANITA]

this is sad ,,, I am wondering if he married ,,, you only with the intention of getting legalized one day ???

please get rid of him ,,, you dont need nobody like him around you

[epm525]

OMG Genie - I don't know what to say. I can't believe this. With everything you have been through. You deserve someone who appreciates you -- you have such a wonderful heart! I'm so sorry.

[latinsoulmate]

OMG! There are just not words to say how sorry I am for what you are going through right now. You definitely do not deserve to be treated this way. Keeping you in my thoughts & prayers.

[ratito921]

genie I am so sorry that you're going through this. I won't tell you what you should or shouldn't do. I've been there done that and I know that I myself made reason/excuses of everything and I stayed until it almost killed me. You need to do what's best for you. When you get the strength and the knowledge and the courage (don't worry you will) you'll do what's best for you. *hugs* to you and I hope that you're safe. We're here if you need us. Please take care.

[Lupita]

genie, i am so sorry you are going through this, no one deserves to be treated this way.

*Never srike your wife-even with a flower*

[UnsureSmile]

You def. deserve better than him. You are too wonderful to be treated this way..especially after everything you've done for him...

[Pinkpig]

Please protect yourself. When you feel threatened please call the police - 911

FYI: Our lawyer specializes in abuse. Here are some links to her site.

http://www.humanrightsattorney.com/sub/index.jsp?contentid=WgxRxTUoLPTkzFRon8u2I8PQ

The National Domestic Abuse Hotline

http://www.ndvh.org/


If something about your relationship with your partner scares you and you need to talk, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE (7233) or 1-800-787-3224 (TTY).

I will keep you in my thoughts. Hugs!

[pumpkin916]

OMG Genie, I am SO sorry you are going through this! Unbelievable, how he has the nerve to treat you this way, after everything you have done for him! I wish we lived closer - I would have you come and stay with me... Please find the courage inside you to stand up and kick this loser to the curb. I agree with what everyone else has already said... He definitely doesn't deserve you OR the Green Card! Kick his ***** out, and it will show who has been using whom! Please let me know if you need anything. All of us on the site are your family, whether we have met in person or not. We are all here for you. Hugs for you, girl. Hang in there; you can get through this. It will be much easier than what you have already been through.

[egonzalez1975]

WOW, you are definitely in a horrible situation and I am so sorry that you have to endure this. You were such a rock to so many of us that were down and out when our husbands weren't here. In the end you DON'T deserve this. I agree with Ratito that you will make the best/right decision for yourself. It is always easy when you are on the outside to say what should be done. Personally I think you should get rid of him, get a hold of an attorney to find out about removing his GC due to the obvious fraud that he committed, and wave as he is being sent back to Mexico. Right where he belongs. Let's see if he is so haughty when he is back home with no credit cards and not a pot to piss in. He'll wish he had that SUV with a flat tire and dead battery. Maybe he'll have a chance to think about the way that he disrespected you and called you out of your name. I agree karma is a B**** but this IS his karma and he needs to feel her.

I can tell you that my ex-husband and him sound like they have a lot in common. I invested way too much in that relationship and the truth is that when it was over I didn't get out of bed for 3 weeks except to get a bath. But, at the end of that 3 weeks I was better than I ever was before. I could actually breathe again. I could feel life inside of me. I remember I used to exercise to the song I Will Survive and cry at the same time. I know it sounds strange but I really listened to the words and I did things to keep my body moving. It took a lot but getting rid of him was the best thing that I have EVER done in my life.

No one has a perfect marriage and I still face issues in my marriage now but in comparison to what I had and even with all of my husbands faults I am glad that I didn't waste 1 more day of my life with my ex. He drained the life right out of me.

Oh Genie, I am so sorry and being in the group of us who were going through all of this together you showed enormous strength. Don't second guess yourself. Women are more powerful and stronger than we know until it's time to dig deep down inside of ourselves and pull that strength. Now is the time to do that and not accept anything but the best for yourself. BECAUSE YOU ARE THE BEST!!!!!!

Hugs Genie!!!!

[2004mms]

OMG!! This is awful!!

There is no way that a husband who, truly loves his wife, is kind, considerate and loving make such a drastic change in a 14 month separation. A separation that you have, painfully, endured in order to help him. He should have returned with a, even greater, need to love and appreciate you for loving and caring enough to make such a sacrifice for him.

I am sorry, but he had a plan, way, before the legalization process started. It wouldn't suprise me if he didn't have the other woman, as well.

How dare, he?! He took advantage of your caring personality to con you into falling in love with him. Please, don't let him get away with this. You do not deserve it. Protect yourself. Take advantage of the advice and information that some have provided and report the abuse. You CAN get his documents revoked. I don't remember where I read it, but I'm sure that they can tell you at USCIS.

I realize that it is easy for me to say this because I am not the one living this nightmare, but you cannot let him get away with this. You deserve a lot better.

I pray that God sends you the strength and knowledge to make the best decision.

May God Bless you.

[dnatej]

Genie, I'm so sorry you are going thru this! Words cant express my feelings after reading this, it is so HORRIBLE! I agree w/others and that you need to get him outa there! About the GC I also think that you need to get it revoked, b/c I dnt think its about revenge, but as others have said "its fraud", and he is a criminal! And dnt they say we are legaly financially responsible for that other person for x amount of year, and that would be another burden on you, please contact someone for help w/the abuse, and the GC. Sending you lots of hugs, and always remeber that you are way better than that and do not deserve this! I will keep you in my prayers!

[madrika]

I AM SO SORRY GENIE!!! This is just not acceptable!!!!
You need to let him go....I know it's hard, very hard, after all you did for him, the wait and everything you went through, but he obviously doesn't appreciate it and you don't deserve that!
YOU ARE STRONG....you have already proven THAT to yourself a long time ago!

[M&M]

Oh Genie, I'm so sorry!

I just keep remembering how he whined and whined about "honey, I want to come home" and then this is how he treats you! What a lying scumbag!

Pray girl, pray first and then get out!

I'm with the girls who think the greencard should be revoked. I mean it's obvious that he didn't even come back with the intent to try to make your marriage work. This isn't just a marriage that didn't work out. It's been a lie from the start or at least for quite a long time and you should not be responsible for that liar!

I'm so sorry, hugs and God Bless you!

[jessfs8]

I agree with everyone else here when they say you are a strong woman for sharing your story with us, I believe he had a plan since the get go and he is actually showing his true colors now. This is who he really is and since he got his green card he thinks he doesn't need you anymore and theres nothing you can do about it when in fact there is. That said you need to concentrate on YOU and ONLY YOU now. No one deserves to be abused and it will only get worse. My son's father started the same way and ended up beating me one day, until that day I realized how much he had hurt me, packed my bags and move 12 hours away from where we lived but I was so young then I didn't know any better and we already had a son so I was so afraid that I would not be able to do it without support but I did it and so can you. No one knows how strong they are until something like this happens and you get out of the relationship. It's all about you and only you can decide whats best for you and I am sure you already know that he is not the best for you and while you waste your time with this looser you can be missing out on so many good things in your life, live your life to the fullest and DO NOT let him walk over you anymore. We are all here for you and help you get thru this, do not let him harm you anymore, you are a great woman and DO NOT forget that :wink:

[mjfalove]

Genie--i am so sorry that u are going through this....u have always been so supportive to everyone and we are all here for you as well......u are precious and deserve better than that....after the seperation, it should have brought you closer if it is truly meant to be....i am sorry that he thinks he has the right to treat u that way....don't put up with it and if you need anything let me know..i will pray for you to find the strength to make the right decision for you.

[ojos_de_alicia]

ayy Genie.. im so sorry this isnt fair to you.. you were so strong for all of us on here!!!!

all i want to do is hug you!!!! i really hope you decide whats best to do for you.. but it sounds like you've tried so hard trying to make things as easy as possible for him.. and he's just taking advantage...

its really not fair!!! HUGS:hug:

[RMJM30]

Genie I hope today you're having a better day. I was totally crushed to read your post. That is exactly the effects immigration can have on us. It will either bring you closer or tear you further apart. I'm sorry this has happened to you. My family on more than one occasion has stressed that they feel my husband may one day leave me after he receives his gc and I tell them you know what that's between him and God because he made a vow to me and if he does not keep it than oh wells can't hold on to someone forever. But Genie you know your heart and how much you can handle. Have you tried giving him some of his own medicine? I'm more than sure you were expecting a husband not a room mate because that's the way things are looking. Maybe that's what you need to to let him share the expenses of the home. How is it that you're going to be spending all YOUR hard earned money and have him save his OH NO WAY!!! You know what if he wants to be your room mate than split expenses down the middle. If he doesn't pay on time kick him to the curb. If He can't appreciate all you do for him then he simply does not deserve you. Have a chat with God let him guide you on what you need to do. If you need someone to chat with I live in the DFW area I would be more than happy to give you my number. Maybe we can meet and you can pour your heart out. I promise not to judge. I pray you have peace in your heart.

[jveli]

I am soooo sorry for what you are going through. Emotional abuse is the worst, the scars that it leaves is undeniable worse than being physically hit. I reccomend two authors/books...

"Verbal Abuse: Survivors Speak Out: On Relationship and Recovery" by Patricia Evans (also wrote "The Verbally Abusive Relationship")

AND

It's My Life Now: Starting Over After an Abusive Relationship or Domestic Violence" by Meg Kennedy Dugan, M.A. and Roger R. Hock, Ph.D.

Both of these books help save my life...

No one deserves to be treated that way...and if it comes down to it...divorce...bring up the emotional abuse in the hearings and do not let some lawyer tell you not to...with no fault divorces none of this will be brought up..(document everything he does, keep a journal), and ask/sue his a@$ in the divorce for all the immigration related costs that you dished out...even if you lose...it will still be on public record.

When I finish my degree it is my intention to be a Victim Witness Advocate specializing in Domestic Violence...

[jveli]

You also have available to you a restraining order. I would go to your local domestic violence agency and tell them what he has been doing...

They also have support groups at these agencies, and often they make a HUGE difference in the lives of the women who attend.

[~MP~]

first of all hugs.....
i am so sorry you have had to put up with all this..but i would have to hand him divorce paper...this is verbal abuse...actually I would call the cops first and then hand over the divorce papers.
you deserve to be treated like a princess..and you are a beautiful woman.

[Amazonmamita]

I hope you do what you think if best for your situation, I am sorry that this is happening to you. You deserve happiness, look inside of yourself and you will find strength.

[DocD]

Even though I don't know you and am new to this site, your story did upset me. I applaud you for opening up, even in writing that is the first step. I hope you decide to pursue a solution to your problem and not decide to just "live with it". You do deserve to be respected, especially by your husband. I have included information on contact info for help if you cannot afford counseling, one is for a shelter if you feel the need.
Genesis Women's Shelter (214) 946-HELP
"The Shelter" serves women and children who are forced to seek refuge from violence homes. The shelter provides basic necessities such as food and clothing, individual and group counseling, medical and legal aid, job training, bilingual services and much more.
Genesis Women's Outreach (214) 559-2050"Outreach" provides counseling for families who do not currently need shelter.
- Outreach provides individual and group counseling, child and adolescent therapy, sexual assault counseling, parenting classes, counseling for family and friends of victims of domestic violence, play therapy, and much more.

Annie's House (214) 946-1129 Annie's House is our transitional housing facility. Annie's House offers safe and affordable housing alternatives to clients who have completed the shelter process. Annie's House has 18 fully furnished apartments with both one and two bedrooms.
- Residents of Annie's House continue counseling, participate in classes such as ESL, resume writing, etc. The focus at Annie's House shifts from the immediacy of staying safe to personal growth and self esteem development.

[jveli]

It does not matter if you are the one doing the leaving. You can still prove that he used you. That is a misconception on most peoples parts, that the person doing the leaving is the one who "looks bad". If he thinks by her leaving him, it makes his case look better, makes him appear innocent...he is WRONG. He is trying to play you by trying to get you to leave him, but his way of thinking/theory is completely off base.

[Torres]

I am so sorry for what you are going through. I hope things work out for you. whatever is best for you. my prayers are with you.

[sunnysol]

You are strong--you've been through this immigration nightmare--you've taken care of everything yourself--Don't think that you can't build a new life for yourself. Thank you for being so honest--It really helps everyone who is in this same situation! My thoughts are with you--Be strong and do what's right for your life!

[liley99]

Mamacita,

I am so sorry to hear this story, I probably am going to react a little different for others, Yes obviously he is caught and feels you are in his way. He has no respect and is obviously a disrespectful person to address any woman in that way, especially in front of you.

To me if he loved you he wouldn't treat you that way. Honestly in my case I wouldn't let him go peacefully. I would try in any way I could to take back what you helped him get. Any relationship that would go through that and finally suceed, when you stood by him the whole time and come back in this manner. Absolutely not. I am sorry I would destroy my husbands life, especially after 5 years of marriage.

I honestly send hugs and a shoulder to cry on, if you ever need to talk like many others have said I am here.

I wish you the best of luck, and you know that it is not a healthy relationship, you deserve way better. GOOD LUCK! :gaah:

[carlosalica]

You know your story really sticks out to me... I went through the same thing.. now I'm the one looking back thinking how in the H##L did I stay that long? I agree with gdalicia if I should say WHEN you get the strength to leave him you will look back and say wow WHY DID I STAY???
He is saying everything is your fault, hoping you believe it, because he knows really it is his fault and without you he wouldn't be where he is today!!
You CAN do it on your own, and better than now! I know I'm not the only one that has been through this before and you can ask everyone and the one thing they will say is why didn't I leave earlier?
You will feel so much better about YOURSELF if you get out!!
We all wish you the best!

[JustMe]

I am speechless and have chills all over my body. Please leave him as soon as possible . You are such a strong woman you will do much better without him.

[Theresa]

Mamacita,



To me if he loved you he wouldn't treat you that way. Honestly in my case I wouldn't let him go peacefully. I would try in any way I could to take back what you helped him get. Any relationship that would go through that and finally suceed, when you stood by him the whole time and come back in this manner. Absolutely not. I am sorry I would destroy my husbands life, especially after 5 years of marriage.


I wish you the best of luck, and you know that it is not a healthy relationship, you deserve way better. GOOD LUCK! :gaah:

:ditto:

[JMRJ]

:angry: Genie, I'm sorry this happened to you after everything you've done for him. He does not deserve to stay for another minute in your house. Your emotional, psychological and physical state is in obvious real danger. You must break free and even if he cries blood to take you back, you must stay free. The damage he is causing you is way below the belt!:angry:

[ARodrigues]

My God. I'm so sorry this is happening. I know how it must hurt, but my honest opinion is to get out of this. There is nothing to resolve with a man like that. It will hurt even more at first, but you'll have more peace and be stronger than ever. Just cut your losses and go. I'm sorry.

[milliesmom]

Genie, just checking in to see how you are doing. I hope you are gaining strength. We are here for you. :hug: :hug:

[joy&pain]

Big Hugs, Genie!!!!

[jeannie]

First I want to say that I am sorry you are going through this. I also know that you must really love your husband to put up with it.Something needs to change.You have a lot of guts in writing this. This tells me that you are a strong women. you don't deserve this. Why is your husband acting this way? Where is the love and respect on his side? I'm glad that you are taking a step forward and telling everyone your story. This will only make you stronger.start getting your self esteem back you are really beautiful and I am sure that your have a lot of other qualities,you just forgot what they were.everyone knows that you don't deserve this.I send you my hugs.

[mexicanlove]

Pretend your the pizza lady at the door and serve his &^*& with divorce papers.You don't need a man to treat your this way. What a jerk.

[tasksgirl]

I agree it seems like he is trying to get you to leave him.. I am not sure if he entered into this with the intent of fraud or not.. but I think now he wants out and doesn't know how.. so he is trying to be as nasty and cold as possible.. my husband did this once a LOOONG time ago.. we were 2000 miles apart and it seemed hopeless.. it was getting to hard and he loved me but he thought it would be better to let me go so I wouldn't suffer.. so he was trying to be as nasty to me as he could so that I would move on and not be sad.. but I figured him out and he admitted it and now 4 years later here we are.. not saying it was a smart thing but maybe to give you some insight into men think.. although he is likely not thinking of YOUR feelings right now just his. Men don't like to just straight out leave for some reason I guess they want YOU to leave..

It definately sounds like he has another woman..she could possibly be someone he met back in Mexico.. be careful.. my husband's cousin did this.. he married someone here, got his papers, and then turned right around and petitioned to bring this other girl.. it was his plan all along..

Only you know if the relationship you guys had was pure illusion.. or if it is just suffering from all the time apart.. only you can decide if it's worth fixing or if you want to fight for it.. if you do decide it's worth fighting for you HAVE to stand up for yourself, confront him, don't hold back. Tell him EVERYTHING you are feeling. It's not fair the way he is acting and he deserves to be totally b***ed at for not appreciating all your suffering and hard work to accomodate him.. Give him a last final chance to save the relationship and then leave if he doesn't step up.

[hilarya]

Genie,
I am so sorry for you. I can't say that Sammy used you for the green card. What I can say is that Mexico changed him, and it did my husband as well. I am here for you. The time away changes both of you. I am not gonna say that he used you Genie. All I am gonna say is that, I am your friend, and I will hate him if you need me to and like him if you need me to. You are such a positive person. The only thing I want you to know is that you don't deserve this. God will bless you Genie as he blessed us with all of your help.

[tasksgirl]

hmm. I wonder if this is any indication..
"I did notice that on his Visa was a CR1 incorrect and Sammy got really mad, only for 2 yrs he said I waited out 14 months.....we did get it straightened out "

From the CDJ experience thread.. :(

[Cata]

Genie! Where are you? I want to call you at work but I know that's not the best place to talk. I am calling you tonight.
I am completely and utterly upset by Sammy's behavior. I would have never thought he would be treating and disrespecting you this way.

You are a GEM!! I told him that and I told him to never let you go and to always treat you right.
I know it's not my place to tell him anything but I sure wish I could.

I personally went thru a bad relationship much similar to what you are going thru many many years ago. Thank God I got out in time. AND in the end, I did find out he had cheated on me. He fathered a child with another woman!!

I immediately left his a## and never looked back again. You stay with someone with the hopes that they will change but they don't change. It gets worse & worse!! I went thru a nightmare and I woke up and realized that I deserve better and no worthless, disrespecting "man" is going to make my life a living hell.


You DESERVE BETTER!
What the hell is his damn problem? If he has another woman, then that is why he is being verbally abusive towards you. He is going to lose you if he doesn't get his act together period.

If this happened to me personally I would definitely get a divorce.

You sacrificed everything, time, money, loss of sleep and you had surgeries.

I would have a straight talk with him. If he has no heart to understand what you have both been thru, then I would let him go.

My husband would have his days with an attitude but quickly I set him straight. His family & friends would talk about how I would do this or that.
I told him real quick...YOUR DAMN FAMILY did NOT support me or our daughter .THEy did not pay my bills or put food on my table. SOOO, I suggest you keep their comments away from me. I told him I don't deserve to hear his crap after what I've been thru for US.

It will be the hardest decision of your life but you have to demand respect in all aspects of your marriage. Emotionally, verbally, physically YOU DESERVE THE BEST.

If he doesn't realize how great a woman you are in all aspects, then may GOd help him because Karma will get him later.

I love you like a sister and I'm just hurting inside and thinking why?

Do what is right and talk it over with Sammy and if he is set in his ways and doesn't want to save the marriage, then you have to make the decision.
I'm always here for you to talk. You are brave to talk and discuss this with all of us and we are all here for you.

Take care and don't be afraid to put a restraining order on him.

Cata

[RMJM30]

Pretend your the pizza lady at the door and serve his &^*& with divorce papers.You don't need a man to treat your this way. What a jerk.


Mexicanlove I love it..... This was a great post......

[DeBenny]

Wow... I'm so sorry.. you definitely need to get out of this relationship. No words though really, after all you went through, what a travesty. :hug:

I second Laura's comments. I cant even believe this is the thanks you are getting. I am so sorry. :hug:

[hilarya]

I am so sick about this Genie.

[mexicanlove]

Thanks RMJM30, but the reality is that no one can really guess what the hell was up his sleeve in the first place. What, no one, and I mean no one should ever settle for less. No one gets "stollen unless they want to be stollen" Can she even revoke his green card? Damn that sucks. What a coward. I know Mamcita feels horrible, but if you were strong enough to live one year without him, you know that you can manage without him period. That man needs to get slapped and then slapped again!

[mexicanlove]

Don't get mad girly get even. Put on your best dress and heels grab your girls and party like a rock star. Stay out late and see how he likes it! Then serve his divorce papers taped to one of those pre made pozole extra big cans and drop it right on his foot, and smash a pizza on his head on your way out.........see ya &*(&*(^*(&^*(

[milliesmom]

OOh, even better, maybe serve the divorce papers in an envelope labeled with a sticker with "cute little edges" written in Silver and say that your brother (or guy friend) wrote it for you. hahaha. Ohmygod, I so love coming up with evil little ways of getting back at people. I guess being a scorpio is only fun when you get to cast some hateful revenge on someone. :devil:

[mexicanlove]

that's a good one too. or she can tape it on the popped tire of his car. How dare he call her names..........what he needs a beat down.....big time.....I would pour 10 million cans of that pozole into his car and put unmade popcorn into the gas tank.........can you imagine when he starts the car.......popcorn anyone????

[princesa]

I'm soo sorry to hear of this...I will be praying for you. You were such an inspiration to me when I was waiting for my immigration journey to end

[jveli]

Don't get mad girly get even. Put on your best dress and heels grab your girls and party like a rock star. Stay out late and see how he likes it! Then serve his divorce papers taped to one of those pre made pozole extra big cans and drop it right on his foot, and smash a pizza on his head on your way out.........see ya &*(&*(^*(&^*(
I LOVE THIS IDEA! There is nothing like a good night out. Go about very non-chalantly...act like everything is peachy keen at home...let him walk around in his pissy moods...IGNORE HIM. Get ready and look STUNNING...And when it is time to leave, walk by him and say, "Oh yeah, tonight I am going out for drinks with the girls." And walk out...let him sit there and stew!

[jveli]

Another good idea...go about your life like normal...all the while getting the divorce started...get the address of the "other woman", and have the divorce papers served to him at her house!!!!

BUST HIM LARGE!!!!!

[gatita]

This story makes me sick. The abuse is so extreme; I can't even imagine any person would do this. I'm so sorry you went through this. This man is a monster. Either he changed, or he was a great actor. You have spent so much time, energy, and money on getting him legalized. Living through immigration and your separation, obviously you are a super strong woman. Kick him out and divorce him now. You deserve a good life! HUGS

[mymexicanman]

Your husband must be related to mine !!!!!!!!

Sooner or later I am gone....

[seasun]

oh my God! This is so bad I am so sorry for you but please donot, do not put up with this only you could put an end to this and should should do it soon I dont believe its gonna get better, I am sorry to say it but its not, the only thing that is missing here is that he has not hit you, yet. Dont wait any longer you deserve better, and after everything youve done you will be better but not with him, I dont know you but everything you have said to us its bad, and like I said its not gonna get better, run while you can, just run...He is not worth it, at all. My boyfriend, we are just gonna start our process, but trust me I am worry about some things, cause we had some issues and everybody does but there are bells very loud bells of warning and sometimes that makes you think... Good luck and youll be in my prayers, but PLEASE DO NOT put up with all that ****...

[ce&ll]

Genie, I'm so shocked to hear this! No one deserves to be treated like this, you have done so much for him and he just doesn't get it! Stay strong girl and do what's best for YOU!

[jsierra1982]

girl, you have got to get away from him!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

that being said, i am truly sorry that this is happening to you, but please don't stay in a verbally and emotionally abusive relationship.

luv ya! stay strong.

[VENZwife]

This truly breaks my heart to read a story like this. I am so sorry Genie. It is just terrible what he has done to you.

[Emily]

I've been thinking about this since I first read it and i'm just so upset for you Genie. I just find it hard to believe that this man whom she thought loved her with all his heart all of a sudden becomes a monster. How could he do this to her; does he not have a heart? How could a man hide himself that good, and for so long without even a hint of who he really is?

know matter Genie, you will move on when you feel it's time, and you WILL find true happiness and love somewhere else. He's the one who will be regretting this once his little hoodrat leaves him for the next married man.

[Emily]

What state do you live in Genie? If you can prove this affair; this affair with this other women, then you can get him for Allomoney (however you spell it). Some states are more lienant then others with cheating spouses.

My friend here in Washington caught her hubby cheating and now he's paying her $1200/month spousal matience (for 5 years) on top of $800 child support (for 1 kid)! She needed the money because she was a stay at home mom for their entire marriage. He had to pay for each year they were married! Plus she got the house, and the better car (Lexis).

Even if you don't need the money it is still your right to collect. Make his butt suffer like your suffering. Hit him where it hurts.

[mymexicanman]

there is NO need for another man.... just be happy with URSELF..

[mpls-mexico]

I am so sorry Genie. I don't even know what to say besides you deserve to be happy in your life. Please focus on yourself and what it is you want in life and make the changes to get it. Your husband doesn't deserve you...he is sucking the life out of you. He is a leech.

[angelito21]

I too am very sorry to read about how your husband has been treating you. No one deserves to be treated this way! ! You're worth so much more. I hope you make the right decision and stand up for yourself. You've proven to everyone how strong you are...specially to him! Please do not allow this man to give you one more day of unhappiness.

You have all our support.

God bless you!

Norma

[tasksgirl]

OOh, even better, maybe serve the divorce papers in an envelope labeled with a sticker with "cute little edges" written in Silver and say that your brother (or guy friend) wrote it for you. hahaha. Ohmygod, I so love coming up with evil little ways of getting back at people. I guess being a scorpio is only fun when you get to cast some hateful revenge on someone. :devil:

LOL I love this idea..

[tasksgirl]

Your husband must be related to mine !!!!!!!!

Sooner or later I am gone....

What do you mean ???

[mymexicanman]

well my husband is the same if not worse !!!!! i think i will make a new thread for it.... once i am ready

[DeBenny]

well my husband is the same if not worse !!!!! i think i will make a new thread for it.... once i am ready

I am sorry to hear this. Once you are ready to share, I hope that we could all provide you with support, kind words, and help. :hug:

[J3NNI]

He is so mean, and your right he must not love you or he would not talk to you that way or cheat on you.While he is gone change your locks and put his stuff on the curb, because you know you can not have a civil talk. You will find love again
Jenni

[~MP~]

well my husband is the same if not worse !!!!! i think i will make a new thread for it.... once i am ready

Wow your husband is worse....are you guys going through the process?

[mymexicanman]

yes we are and I am thinking about stoping it...let me make a new thread and i will let u all know... give me a day or 2...i dont want to take away mamacitas thread....

[slvjvm922000]

genie just stopping in to see how u are doing? our prayers are with u girl

[Salyyo]

I will join you guys in the prayers so that everything works out well for Genie.

[aprilstorm]

All I am gonna say is that, I am your friend, and I will hate him if you need me to and like him if you need me to. You are such a positive person. The only thing I want you to know is that you don't deserve this. God will bless you Genie as he blessed us with all of your help.

I agree with Hilary's post above!!!!

[aprilstorm]

Genie,

How are you doing? We are worried about you.

[JennyM]

All I can say is "This is crazy!" I remember how all of us were going crazy for you to get your long approval....I'm sorry Genie. Take care of yourself.

[Brisa6]

Girl you are too beautiful you need to ask him to leave. You don't deserve that let him go live with that other woman they'll get what they deserve.

[RMJM30]

While he is gone change your locks and put his stuff on the curb, because you know you can not have a civil talk. You will find love again
Jenni

I love this idea. This is a good way to get rid of him and then get a restrain order. Genie I hope you're doing a whole lot better.

[mexicanlove]

We all hope that your doing ok. What if this really wasnt the right individual for you. You can't be in a relationship when hes only putting in 10% (if that) Sometimes things happen, and people take interest in other people even without a good reason, because sometimes the laws of attraction are bigger than us. What if there is someone soo much better out there for you? You cannot keep trying to nurture something that is not there.